It's so weird how tired we all get by night. I can see why Hannah is tired but the rest of us are dragging around by 8:00. I guess emotional exhaustion is as real as physical. It seems by evening Hannah is so tired that everything seems overwhelming and then even the little frustrations are amplified. Because of this she is usually sad in the evenings and that's hard to watch. Tonight though I read her some Valentines that her cute cousins sent her, and I also some letters from friends at home and it really seemed to cheer her up. Hopefully she can sleep well and be ready to go tomorrow.
This hospital has some awesome things to try and help healing. One thing that has really been helping Hannah is getting massages. She has been getting really tense from all her frustrations and then this masseuse comes and works his magic and she's a new girl. I told her not to get used to it but I think she already is. They also use aromatherapy and she has loved that too. I think integrating these kinds of things with conventional methods is so great. I love that this hospital is open new ways of thinking when it comes to healing!
Well, it's 9:00 so I better be getting to bed-ha ha Yes, I am acting like I'm 80 but 3 a.m. comes around fast-that's when they come in to draw labs and wake Hannah up. Yep-their days start early around this place. CRAZY!!! Good night everyone.
This picture was taken right before Hannah went in to get her gallbladder out on Sunday. She was smiling all the way. I think she thought she was in a parade! Who smiles on their way to surgery??
Tuesday, February 28, 2017
Tuesday day
Hannah had been waking up at 3 am for the past few nights and so last night they decided to give her some melatonin at 2. Yep it worked. She has pretty much just wanted to sleep today. She did have the swallow study this morning and it went well. She can start to eat a little bit-a modified diet that does not include Chik-FilA, but it's a start! They also will be giving her more therapy time. The minimum requirement to get into the rehab program is three hours a day, so I think in a few more days she'll be there. I'm hoping she can start next week. I'm kind of nervous about the program because it sounds pretty intense, and I hope she will be strong enough for it. I know it will be good for her but I also think she still needs lots of rest for her brain. This learning to talk again is a hard hard thing and seems to take so much energy! I know most the time she is so frustrated, but she really is getting better at letting us know what she's thinking. Today she was trying to tell us something for the longest time-and the only word I could understand was hungry. I thought she meant she was hungry, but we finally understood that she was worried about our pets at home being hungry. I think she doesn't have much faith in her parents to take care of business. But all is well and no animals have starved to death. Points for us! Write more tonight.
Monday, February 27, 2017
Monday night
Ok-Apparently there were some of you who thought I was just going to let Hannah go to town on a whole chik-fil- a sandwich (hmmmm like MY OWN CHILDREN)! Give me a little credit-ha ha That wasn't my plan. But actually when Paul got back with the food she had chickened out of eating the chicken. She is still really hesitant to eat because she's afraid of choking. Anyway, Paul said he'll go back tomorrow after her swallow test and get her another one. At least now we know what sounds good to her.
She is beyond tired tonight. She worked so hard in therapy and insisted on taking three more short walks. It's crazy to see how weak you can get after a month of being out of commission. Needless to say all of that really wore her out. But she seemed quite proud of herself for walking. I'm happy when she can see that she is making progress- I think it gives her the motivation to keep going and to push herself.
My brother Paul is here for a few days and Hannah seemed really glad to have him come. We were sitting here tonight talking about all the nice things people have said and done for our family since this all began. He said, "If we could all just hear these kinds of stories everyday instead of listening to the news, think what a different perspective we would have of the people in this world." That's so true. I wholeheartedly believe most people are so good, and kind, and compassionate. But sometimes after watching the news you wonder if anyone has those qualities anymore. We are so bombarded with the crazy and awful things people are doing in this world that we start to get a warped perspective of what the bulk of humanity is really like.
My long time wonderful friend came to visit tonight. She brought an envelope with a lot of money in it. She told me that her ten year old neighbor had been having bake sales the last few months because she wanted to raise money to help someone. When she heard about Hannah she decided she wanted to give the money to her. So she brought it to my friend who brought it to us. I could hardly believe that someone would want to help a person they had never met in such a generous and Christ-like way. And to know all the work that had gone in to raising the money (by her and her mom I'm sure) made it even more meaningful. I went back to Hannah's room and told her. She got the cutest expression on her face that I have ever seen. It was a combination of joy and awe. She couldn't believe someone she didn't know could be so kind. I hope someday soon we get to met this awesome little girl. She is the perfect example all the is right in this world.
Today I am so overwhelmed and grateful for the miracles we've seen. I believe in the power of prayer and I want you to know how thankful we are for all your prayers that have been said on behalf of Hannah. We couldn't have made it without them and without your love. Thank you.
She is beyond tired tonight. She worked so hard in therapy and insisted on taking three more short walks. It's crazy to see how weak you can get after a month of being out of commission. Needless to say all of that really wore her out. But she seemed quite proud of herself for walking. I'm happy when she can see that she is making progress- I think it gives her the motivation to keep going and to push herself.
My brother Paul is here for a few days and Hannah seemed really glad to have him come. We were sitting here tonight talking about all the nice things people have said and done for our family since this all began. He said, "If we could all just hear these kinds of stories everyday instead of listening to the news, think what a different perspective we would have of the people in this world." That's so true. I wholeheartedly believe most people are so good, and kind, and compassionate. But sometimes after watching the news you wonder if anyone has those qualities anymore. We are so bombarded with the crazy and awful things people are doing in this world that we start to get a warped perspective of what the bulk of humanity is really like.
My long time wonderful friend came to visit tonight. She brought an envelope with a lot of money in it. She told me that her ten year old neighbor had been having bake sales the last few months because she wanted to raise money to help someone. When she heard about Hannah she decided she wanted to give the money to her. So she brought it to my friend who brought it to us. I could hardly believe that someone would want to help a person they had never met in such a generous and Christ-like way. And to know all the work that had gone in to raising the money (by her and her mom I'm sure) made it even more meaningful. I went back to Hannah's room and told her. She got the cutest expression on her face that I have ever seen. It was a combination of joy and awe. She couldn't believe someone she didn't know could be so kind. I hope someday soon we get to met this awesome little girl. She is the perfect example all the is right in this world.
Today I am so overwhelmed and grateful for the miracles we've seen. I believe in the power of prayer and I want you to know how thankful we are for all your prayers that have been said on behalf of Hannah. We couldn't have made it without them and without your love. Thank you.
Monday afternoon
Sorry I'm so late in writing today. It's been a big day. This morning about 7 Hannah woke up and let me know she wanted to stand up. I thought she just want to go a few steps to the bathroom so I started helping her-but nooo she had MUCH BIGGER PLANS. She started out the door, which sent two nurses scrambling to grab all her lines and the IV pole, and she continued on down the hall. I said I feel like I just saw Lazarus rise from the dead. It was the craziest thing I have ever seen! (They have nick named her Lazarus). I guess she was just sick of laying around and decided to get moving. Everyone who saw her do it was awe struck. I was holding on to her arms but she was supporting and walking herself! I just wish the neurologist who said she'd most likely never walk again would have been there. So another day and another unbelievable miracle! This girl may have more than her fair share of trials, but she also has had more miracles than anyone I've ever known. It's amazing to watch the hand of the Lord in her life on a daily basis. My heart is full!
Ok I was just about to post this when Hannah got really agitated trying to tell me something. We finally guessed she wants to eat! She's not supposed to eat until tomorrow when they give her the "official" swallow test but she's been eating little bits of things for the speech therapist and doing well. So we start naming things-pudding? applesauce? potatoes? no! no! no! She was getting more and more frustrated when she finally blurted out (very mumbled but I still understood it) Chik Fil A! ha ha Can you believe that? So her uncle Paul was here and he tore out of here like his pants were on fire-ha ha He is now on his way to Chik Fil A and will shortly be smuggling in some food to his favorite girl.
I'll let you know how this goes tonight. Wish us luck-ha ha
Ok I was just about to post this when Hannah got really agitated trying to tell me something. We finally guessed she wants to eat! She's not supposed to eat until tomorrow when they give her the "official" swallow test but she's been eating little bits of things for the speech therapist and doing well. So we start naming things-pudding? applesauce? potatoes? no! no! no! She was getting more and more frustrated when she finally blurted out (very mumbled but I still understood it) Chik Fil A! ha ha Can you believe that? So her uncle Paul was here and he tore out of here like his pants were on fire-ha ha He is now on his way to Chik Fil A and will shortly be smuggling in some food to his favorite girl.
I'll let you know how this goes tonight. Wish us luck-ha ha
Sunday, February 26, 2017
Sunday night
Hannah had a good day. She really loved having Taylor here. Tonight both he and Bob had to leave. I know Bob feels sick when he has to go back. I feel bad for him.
Today we had some of our favorite people here. They mentioned how great it was to see Hannah smile because it seemed like her old self was back again. It's so funny they said that because I had been thinking today about how I had felt so hopeless with Hannah's situation, and then one day she smiled, and I knew she was back. They say the eyes are the window to the soul, but in Hannah's case it's definitely her smile too.
I have spent a lot of sleepless nights wondering why this would happen to Hannah. It has bothered me because even though I know that we all have tests and trials, it seems like she has had more than her fair share. It also seems like this is such a refiner's fire, and it doesn't seem to me like she needed much refining? Maybe her family does? I don't know, but I do know I've gone through a whole realm of possibilities and in the end I've come up as uncertain as when I began. But what I have come up with is this; Someday I will know, maybe not in this lifetime, but someday. And until that day comes, I just have to have faith that God knows- and trust that because He is a loving father, she's in good hands. These have been my thoughts, and then today my wonderful niece sent me this poem. It has always been one of my favorites, but I had forgotten about it until today. So thanks for sharing it Katie.
By Corrie Ten Boom
“My life is but a weaving
Between my God and me.
I cannot choose the colors He weaveth steadily.
Oft’ times He weaveth sorrow;
And I in foolish pride
Forget He sees the upper
And I the underside.
Not ’til the loom is silent
And the shuttles cease to fly
Will God unroll the canvas
And reveal the reason why.
The dark threads are as needful
In the weaver’s skillful hand
As the threads of gold and silver
In the pattern He has planned
He knows, He loves, He cares;
Nothing this truth can dim.
He gives the very best to those
Who leave the choice to Him.”
Sunday afternoon
Crazy rough night but today is a good day. I don't know if it's because she has started to eat and drink a little on her own or what, but she has been throwing up. It seems better this afternoon though. Hopefully she's done with that. I can't imagine throwing up with that huge incision-that's got to hurt.
One good thing that happened in the night was when she needed me she called out "MOM!" Wow! Who ever thought one word could make a person so happy? She is really trying to form words-pretty basic stuff but it's good to know the mechanics of the whole speaking process are in working order. I think it's just going to be a ton of practice. She's been in a lot better mood today too-probably because Taylor is here. It's really sweet to watch him with her. He is catering to her every whim. She even laughed and stuck her foot out for him to massage and let tell you, that is something I never thought I'd see him do for anyone! (Our family has a thing about feet-ha ha) But yes-he's been sitting her massaging her foot with Sweet Pea lotion (although he is complaining loudly that he smells like a girl)-which she is delighting in.
Taylor and I went to church at the hospital again today. it was fast meeting here because next week is their stake conference. When I first when in I was thinking how we were here last Fast Sunday and thinking that this had sure been a long month. And ok, I was feeling kind of sorry for all of us. Then some woman gets up to talk and her story was so sad (most of them are here). Anyway, her and her husband had been here with their son for the last 16 months. Oh my heck! You would think by now I would know never to complain. Every time I do, I am humbled by someone else's situation and end up feeling grateful for my own. It seemed though that every person who got up to speak had something so profound to say. One guy talked about how all of us in that room had been blessed with some very special privileges to be raising these choice, exceptional kids. And it's so true. So many people (who are just trying to be nice I'm sure) have said how lucky Hannah is to have come to our family. But the truth is that we are so blessed and privileged to be HER family. She has taught us our most important life lessons-not only through her trials but just because of the person she is. I don't know how we got so lucky, but I sure am grateful. Happy Sunday!
One good thing that happened in the night was when she needed me she called out "MOM!" Wow! Who ever thought one word could make a person so happy? She is really trying to form words-pretty basic stuff but it's good to know the mechanics of the whole speaking process are in working order. I think it's just going to be a ton of practice. She's been in a lot better mood today too-probably because Taylor is here. It's really sweet to watch him with her. He is catering to her every whim. She even laughed and stuck her foot out for him to massage and let tell you, that is something I never thought I'd see him do for anyone! (Our family has a thing about feet-ha ha) But yes-he's been sitting her massaging her foot with Sweet Pea lotion (although he is complaining loudly that he smells like a girl)-which she is delighting in.
Taylor and I went to church at the hospital again today. it was fast meeting here because next week is their stake conference. When I first when in I was thinking how we were here last Fast Sunday and thinking that this had sure been a long month. And ok, I was feeling kind of sorry for all of us. Then some woman gets up to talk and her story was so sad (most of them are here). Anyway, her and her husband had been here with their son for the last 16 months. Oh my heck! You would think by now I would know never to complain. Every time I do, I am humbled by someone else's situation and end up feeling grateful for my own. It seemed though that every person who got up to speak had something so profound to say. One guy talked about how all of us in that room had been blessed with some very special privileges to be raising these choice, exceptional kids. And it's so true. So many people (who are just trying to be nice I'm sure) have said how lucky Hannah is to have come to our family. But the truth is that we are so blessed and privileged to be HER family. She has taught us our most important life lessons-not only through her trials but just because of the person she is. I don't know how we got so lucky, but I sure am grateful. Happy Sunday!
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