Sunday night

All's I can say is the dr. who told us this was going to be a roller coaster  ride knew what he was talking about. I knew some days would be good and some not so good, but I didn't realize the ups and downs would be happening so many times every day. Right after Hannah woke up this morning I thought she seemed a little more in tune. She was trying to focus on my face and seemed to have more of an awareness of what was going on around her. As Meg said earlier, the dr. told us to try and surround her with things that were familiar. Fortunately she had some familiar faces with friends and family  who visited today, which was so good for her. We tried to just have one or two people at her bed at a time so it wasn't chaotic and she seemed pretty calm and somewhat interested in everyone. Her friend Zoe was playing music and singing to her-apparently she was singing the wrong words and Hannah laughed. Then later her cousin Neil came in to see her and said, "Hannah, your favorite cousin is here!" And she laughed again. Those were two wonderful moments!!!! She also had two very sweet friends who sat at her bedside and held her hands while they talked to her. I think that made her very happy.
The nurse noticed early on in the day that her pupils were different sizes. As the day wore on they became more and more worried about that and her tendency to favor her left side. So in the end they unhooked her from dialysis and everything else and took her for an MRI. The results were similar to those of the CAT scan. Both showed no signs of stroke but they did show swelling in her brain. Tomorrow we will meet with neurology and see if they can be more specific about their concerns. Because they had to move her around so much this afternoon they ended up giving her more Meds so tonight she looks like a drugged out zombie again. It makes me so sad. It's going to be a battle to get these drugs out of her system when she really needs them for her pain. Another balancing act.
Tonight we talked to a nurse that we've known for years. I guess he was in the operating room with Hannah the night she had the emergency surgery. That was definitely a discussion I would have been better off not having. We knew that she coded twice and that things were definitely life threatening at that moment, but we didn't realize everything that went into saving her. Sometimes ignorance really is bliss.
But it made me realize more than ever what a miracle it is that Hannah is still here with us. Really truly something happened that night that cannot be explained in any rationale or logical way. So I keep telling myself that if Hannah was really given a miracle, there must be a reason. I think God has some big plans for her.
Tonight I'm feeling so grateful for my beautiful family. This afternoon we gathered together with the family and friends that were here today and had a special prayer for Hannah. It sounds totally ludicrous that we could be feeling peace in our current situation, but that is exactly what I felt after our prayer.. So grateful for the faith of all those that were there and also for the faith of all of you. We have felt such an outpouring of love from so many. We feel very blessed to know and love so many incredible people!  Thank you for everything.  Please keep praying for our precious girl!