Thursday, March 23

Hannah had a pretty good day, mixed with some discouraging moments.  She keeps pretty positive most of the time because I think she's starting to realize how much better she's getting and she sees she can do things that she couldn't do last week.  But then she'll have a moment where she goes to do something that before was totally automatic-and realizes she really can't do it now.  Today it was writing.  Let's just say that it's not real legible at this point.  But the good thing is that she knows what the words are supposed to look like, she just can't coordinate her hands well enough to do it.  Three weeks ago she could hardly move her arms, and now she can move her arms and do quite a few things with her hands.  She is improving so much, but not fast enough for her liking.  She feels like she is putting in the work and doing her best and so she should have more immediate results.  I know she will get there though, she is so determined.  If I do anything for her, like take off the lid of the toothpaste, she will ask me to put it back on so she can do it herself.   I've decided the one piece of equipment that they need for the gym that they don't have yet is a is a punching bag.  Every day one of the kids seems to hit their limit, and they need to punch something (or someone).  And the parents could use it too.  ha ha  I do worry about her though because she has a hard time showing any negative emotions.  We are all trying to convince her that being sad and frustrated is part of this process and that it's perfectly normal and appropriate to show it.  Pretending that this is all ok isn't healthy.  At least I tell myself that so that my erratic mood swings and crying spells don't seem so irrational. I'm just really emotionally healthy-ha ha Probably Not.
Tonight though, I was reading some of President Hinckley's writings (he really is one of my all time favorite people) and I came upon a quote that I had forgotten about even though it has hung in our kitchen for years.  It was a good reminder for me that all these hard moments that we get so caught up in WILL eventually pass.  He said:  "It isn't as bad as you sometimes think it is.  It all works out.  Don't worry.  I say that to myself every morning.  It all works out in the end.  Put your trust in God, and move forward with faith and confidence in the future.  The Lord will not forsake us.  He will not forsake us.  If we put our trust in Him, if we will pray to Him, if we will live worthy of His blessings, He will hear our prayers."
I already know He hears our prayers.  I just needed the reminder that we don't have to fix this all by ourselves and that He is there to lift our burdens.  I'll have to share this with Hannah in the morning.  She needs to remember this too.